CHAPTER 50

The caller would not give his name, position, or any other information beyond this being an official notification. Not long after that, armored cars along with large numbers of heavily armed elf infantry blocked off the roads to the United State Embassy in Cheau-Gan. There were enough of them to make Bob Isaacs a little bit nervous. He knew how many Marines they had on hand, plus a small staff of military personnel, and even with the other guys who knew how to shoot, the score always added up to the same thing. If the Elves wanted to storm the place there wasn’t really anything here to stop them.

That was why Bunker’s reaction to the latest development puzzled Bob so much. The guy got all bent out of shape over some eggs getting moved, which had sort of been Bob’s mission from day one, and the sight of an army deploying outside of his gates did not even rankle a single feather. Bob actually asked the man why this was the case. The Ambassador had simply replied, “I’ve worked several posts in the middle east, colonel.” Bob gave up trying to understand the guy after that.

As it turned out, what the Ambassador was really waiting to see was what brought his staff, General Garret, and Bob to the roof of the main building. They all anxiously watched as a marked embassy car left the grounds and approached the first barricade. Bob was not even sure he had taken many breaths until the car rolled up to the armored vehicle, talked with the elves in front of it, and then was allowed to pass unmolested.

There was actually clapping when the car drove on and vanished from sight. Then the Ambassador looked to his people, gathered on the roof, and said, “well, now we know.” It had only been a test to see if they would violate the agreements they now held with the United States. The car had a single driver, a volunteer, and the diplomatic pouch, that he had carried, only held a single document. If the elves had seized it and somehow got it decoded, they might have been very interested to find out that the cafeteria was serving eggs and bacon tomorrow morning.

Jim Garret was alone in not celebrating. He stepped up next to Bunker and quietly asked, “when do we send the real thing?”

“Right goddamn now General,” Bunker replied, “before they change their mind or find out they made a mistake. They may be letting the official stuff get out but, we still don’t know if anything can get in. We do know they’ve stopped everything else that’s tried to come down that street. We tell Washington what‘s going on, and then, they‘ll return the favor to the Feyland Embassy. That‘s how this game is played. Our best defense is them not wanting us to do it to their people.”

Garret was not comfortable with that and he showed it. He was still in deep thought as he asked, “and if they storm the embassy?”

Bunker was not so happy with that thought either. He simply replied, “we destroy the sensitive material and then throw up our hands. Not much else we can do.”

One of the ambassador’s staff got excited and began pointing down on the street. The reason became apparent to everyone, almost at once. The elves had been very cautious about where they set up their blockade and kept them back at least a block in each direction. While they were not interfering with the other embassies in the areas, including some just across the street, the road was still deserted. That was why one man, on foot, stood out like a Christmas tree at Easter. The man did not seem to have a care in the world as he casually walked right in the front door.

Bob put his binoculars down and looked to Jim who simply nodded and said, “go find out what the guy wants.”

The Ambassador was already on the phone that had been put up here for the Marines. Bunker had a patch in with the front desk and as he talked, he signaled for Bob to stop. When he finished he told the colonel, “seems like you’re required after all Colonel Isaacs. This guy is here to see you.”

Garret was the one who responded and he sounded a bit irked, “who is he?”

Bunker wanted to laugh, “ a name I am somewhat familiar with and, you should be too, Ian Balfour.”

Now Bob was confused. All he could think to say was, “what the hell does he want?”

“Better go find out,” Bunker told him.

A few minutes later Bob was in the lobby and the man who was responsible for supplying his troops, was standing there surrounded by heavily armed US Marines. It did not seem to bother him in the least and, if Bob did not know any better, he would swear that Balfour was trying to piss them off. Bob knew the marines had weapons that were not loaded but, they could still beat the crap out of this guy and that might be, undiplomatic, as much as Bob would have enjoyed seeing it right now.

Balfour tried being polite with Bob but, the guy still came off like a smart ass, “good to see you again. I know we’ve only met briefly from time to time but, you might be aware of certain connections that…”

Bob put his hand up for the man to stop, “I am fully aware Mister Balfour or, is it Sir Ian, or whatever. How did you get in here? The British Embassy?”

“Um,” Balfour wanted to laugh at that suggestion and he fully showed it. Still he said, “not exactly. I’m not very welcome over there these days but, let’s just say that my being here is proof that I’m on the level. I’m here to be your escort colonel.”

That was the last thing that Bob had expected to hear, “mind telling me where?”

“Let us just say,” Balfour responded, “the emperor, personally, has taken an interest in you and desires your presence.”

Bob left Balfour in the company of a certain Marine Captain, by the name of Twitchily, who had the kind of attitude that made Bob think the guy needed to take a laxative. He could not have been a more perfect baby sitter, given Bob’s current mood. Bob then retreated into the bowels of the embassy, and it’s situation room, and reported to his bosses who had just arrived themselves.

After reporting what Balfour said, the ambassador did not seem particularly upset. Again, Bob could never figure out diplomats. Bunker simply told him, “it’s ok colonel Isaacs. I had expected something like this.”

“When were you planning on telling the rest of us,” Bob protested, “or better yet, why the hell does this involve me?”

Garret was the only one sitting and he was still quiet as he replied, “calm down Bob, it’s one reason you’re here.”

“Now you too Jim,” Bob was not so quiet, “thanks a lot.”

“Not many people get a personal audience with Solenceaus,” Bunker stated, “and you did colonel. That makes you more important here than it does in the field. It’s obvious they’re trying to open up some kind of dialogue with us and, for whatever reason, they like talking to you. That’s why you need to go with Balfour. So far, this is the only channel that’s presented itself.”

“What?” Bob did not like this, “I’m not a diplomat!”

Garret looked to Bunker, gave a short laugh, and then back to his man, “maybe that’s why they like talking to you. Either way Bob, you’re the guy on the spot. Think of it as a recon mission. We don’t have a lot of intel here and, right now, we need all we can get.”

If Bunker was insulted by Garret he sure did not show it. If anything, the guy seemed to agree and he also noted about the intelligence situation, “that’s an understatement General. At a post like this back home, I’d have the station chief trying to shove reports up my ass on a minute by minute basis. Here, we don’t have squat. The CIA doesn’t have a network to inform, the NSA doesn’t have any wireless to intercept. We’re literally operating in the dark.”

That only left one word for Garret to say. He looked to Bob and said, “go.”

Bob was not happy about it but, then again, when had the army ever asked him if he was happy about an order, and even if Garret did not put it that way, an order was exactly what it was. A few minutes later, and Bob did not waste time with trivial things like changing out of his field uniform, he was walking back down the street in the company of Ian Balfour. The guy was chatty and still a smart ass. He led Bob to a very unexpected place. It was the strange little embassy that Bob had noted a while back.

As Balfour used an old fashioned key to open up a back gate, that was partially obscured by what must have been a century’s worth of growing vines on the solid wall that surrounded the place, Bob had to ask, “exactly who does this place belong too? I’ve seen it but, every time we ask somebody they always tell us that same joke.”

Balfour opened the gate, pocketed the key, and then invited the colonel inside. When the colonel did not move Balfour asked the man, “and what was this joke they kept telling you, Bob? I can call you Bob right? Robert maybe?”

Bob ignored the name business, “the elves keep saying it belongs to the Republic of Camelot.”

“Oh,” Balfour did laugh but, then he made it clear, “well the republic part is certainly a joke. Although it’s an official one and some don’t find it that funny.”

Still, Bob did not move, “and what about you?”

“Me?” Balfour laughed and then replied, “I think everything is a joke colonel, haven’t you noticed?” Still the soldier remained and Balfour rolled his eyes and then checked his watch. He was a man who had to be somewhere and that made Bob nervous. Finally the guy said, “we’re a country colonel. Well, we’re a country that hasn’t had any borders in a very long time but, who cares? I sure as hell don’t.”

“Camelot?” Bob was unconvinced.

“Look colonel,” Ian stepped in the gate, “do you want to stay out here and wait for an elf patrol to come by and pick you up or do you want to come inside? Your choice but, I know what I’m doing.” Bob grumbled a few choice words under his breath as he stepped in the gate. Balfour closed it behind him and then said, “welcome to the sovereign state of Camelonia, for what it’s worth.” Balfour still sounded like a smart ass when he said it. He then led Bob around the side of the old styled country manor that was partially hidden by shrubs, trees, and vines.

Bob kind of got the feeling that this guy was used to taking the off beaten path and hiding in bushes, like they were now. It also made Bob wonder what it was Balfour was trying to hide here. Was he hiding Bob from something or was he hiding something else from Bob. All the army colonel knew for sure was that he was stepping over a lot of unattended weeds and bushes. It made him just have to ask, “Camelot? Like King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table? That Camelot?”

That did not go over well with Balfour who growled under his breath, “those fucking stories.” When he did address Isaacs he was a bit more cheerful but, only a little. If anything Bob would have guessed the subject ticked him off, “I have no idea where those stories came from and, to be honest with you, I never much gave a shit. As you might have guessed, they aren’t true.”

They reached a car which was parked on a better kept side of this place. It still looked deserted to Bob who just waited by the passenger door as he watched Balfour pull out a set of keys and work the door. Bob did mention to him, “seems to me, they’re a lot truer than I was led to believe.”

As he opened the door Balfour stopped before getting in the classic looking car that Bob would have dated at somewhere around 1930’s vintage. It was in near show room condition for a car that old, if it were indeed that old. Balfour must have taken it for granted, he barely paid it any mind as he told the American, “there is no knights of the round table, ok? Some stupid, uneducated, English twit, got the translation wrong, a long time ago.”

That didn’t sound right coming out of Balfour’s mouth, with that accent, even if it was not quite English. Bob pointed to the man, “you’re English.”

“No,” Ian replied quickly enough, “like I told you. I’m Camelonian.” Balfour then gestured to the car, “now if you please, we’re on a schedule here.”

Bob noticed that the car drove right out of what must have been the front gates of this place, and onto a street, with no problem at all. They did not encounter any Elf patrols on the streets either. Balfour drove right for the elevated freeway and they were speeding towards the downtown area. Bob took the time to prod the guy, “so what was the right translation?”

“What?” Balfour had already forgotten it but, then he recovered quick enough, “oh that. I’m not linguist colonel but, I do know my own language at least. It’s very similar to what you call Welsh. In fact, those are our people, or what’s left of them, anyway.” He did not sound so happy about that but, at least, he continued, “our government is called the Marchogion y Bord y Cylchoedd, in our language.”

When it was clear the American did not get it, Balfour added, “no different than you calling one part of your government congress, or the white house, or whatever. How would you like it if some Russian clod thought your entire government was named the Social Security Administration?”

Now Bob did laugh, “ok I get your point. So how did it get translated wrong? What’s it means?”

“It’s that last word that got everything thrown off,” Balfour was frustrated with this part, “a lot of little languages broke off from ours, or something like that. Cylchoedd means circle in some, uh, circles. It can also mean round and when you put that with Bord, some moron thought round table. Doesn’t mean anything like that. Literally translated, it means the Warrior Leaders of Society or more loosely, of civilization.”

Bob laughed and remained passive as he listened, “so you guys are some ancient country still playing at being one? You found this hole to hide in and now that’s all you got?”

Balfour rolled his eyes, “little more complicated than that colonel. I also don’t have time to explain, even if I was so inclined which, I’m not really.”

“Fine,” Bob was now a bit more antagonistic, “more relevant to the situation, you’ve known about the Dell, all along. How long have guys really been able to open it? Our intel says that RAF Coven Hill has been a base since before World War Two.” The lack of an answer told Bob all he needed to know, “and you kept this a secret for how fucking long? You didn’t think the rest of the world might not want to know? Better yet, you didn’t think we’d figure it out?”
“Oh trust me colonel,” Balfour said as he slowed the car in front of an elf barricade that obviously had the palace sealed off. He continued as they waited to be checked, “we knew you’d eventually figure it out. That’s what’s driving everything here.”

Bob grumbled, “that Ian Dominique guy, the one that allegedly discovered the Dell?”

“He’s a putz,” Balfour had no qualms about that answer, “you ever the met the guy? He thinks he’s more Mick Jagger than Albert Einstein. A perfect face man or, so our media people tell us. I didn’t agree but, not everybody listens to me.”

“Whatever,” Bob blew it off and then waited for Balfour to deal with the Noveus-Faeyu who were manning this roadblock. Bob could not help but notice how easily they let Balfour through. They even looked fearful when he flashed his identification. Once they were past the roadblock, Bob went on, “so if you didn’t just discover the Dell…”

“Why two years ago?” Balfour laughed, “you people figured it out colonel, that’s why. Just like you said. We’d always kept the interactions, between the Fey and Earth, to a minimal. Our ace in the hole, or as you put it, our hole to hide in.”

Bob did not know a great deal about Balfour but, he knew enough. The guy definitely knew how to make money and, that gave Bob an idea, “and a convenient place to sell products and avoid little things like copyrights and royalties?”

That caused Balfour to laugh, “what do you think the Camelonian GDP mainly consists of?” Balfour then went from amused to grumpy, “look, we spread the wealth around. Earth got a lot of good stuff in return, over the centuries. For a long time, the Fey were way ahead of us in everything and some of that stuff wound up back on earth. Some of it you take for granted today, like say, steal? The steam engine? Any of those ring a bell? I won‘t even mention certain medicines that have saved countless lives. They‘re still way ahead of us in that.”

“And you guys got even richer, selling to both sides,” Bob said with a sarcastic sounding laugh.

Balfour took no insult, “somebody had to do it, oh, and here we are.”

Bob noticed they were pulling into a secured parking lot that was a part of the palace complex. They were going to meet with the emperor or, at least, that was what Bob thought. He waited for Balfour to park the car in a spot that was actually marked for just him. Then Bob refused to get out. He asked his next question, “so what tipped your hand?”

Balfour was obviously in a hurry and realized that the soldier was using this to pry him for information. He also realized he had no way around it so, “you mean why did we go public when we did? I already told you.”

“No you didn’t,” Bob replied. “If we figured it out then I didn’t get the memo.”

That caused Balfour to grumble but he came off with, “we were forced into it, at least that’s my sense of it.” When that didn’t go over Balfour tried to explain, “I’m a business man colonel, politics was never my strong suit, particularly with the point ears. You have to understand, there have always been factions, in my government, and with the elves, that wanted to open up relations. That was particularly true when they figured out how to control it. That debate has been going on since before I was even born so I don’t know all the particulars.”

“Something had to have happened to change everything, “Bob replied.

“Yeah it did,” Balfour replied. “It was the Orcs or, so I’m told.”

That sounded strange so Bob asked, “you don’t believe that, do you?”

“I don’t know what to believe and, half the time, I don’t care,” Balfour told him, “that’s one reason I’m telling you all this shit. You’d never get this out of some others on the board. It’s an understatement to say we were quite divided over disclosure.” He took a deep breath and said, “Look, the elves pushed us into buying a bunch of guns for them. They said they needed them because they couldn’t make enough themselves. They came up with some intelligence that made a lot of elves nervous, the kind of elves that are in leadership positions. They were afraid the Orcs, who have been quiet for centuries, were getting ready to do something.”

“So they think a war is coming,” Bob replied.

“Maybe,” Balfour admitted. Then he went on to admit, “I think it’s all bullshit myself but, the point being, we got them the guns.”

Now some things were starting to make sense, “and you raised a red flag with every intelligence agency on Earth, mainly because they had no idea where it was all going.”

“Basically,” Balfour admitted, “it was that little prick of yours, Arbuckle, that managed to track them to Coven Hill. When we realized you people knew that, we had to move. There was nothing left we could do at that point.” Balfour studied the Army colonel and noticed the guy was amused, “what? You don’t believe me? You know Arbuckle has been paying me to move stuff for him, like communications to his people on the other side. He used my trucks to move your eggs and neglected to tell me about it. I should kill the cocksucker but, I know the reputation of the NSA.”

That was something Bob did not know. He just knew that Arbuckle had gotten the eggs home. There was something else though and, it had nothing to do with the eggs, “you’ve been played Balfour.”

“Say it ain’t so,” Balfour replied in a sarcastic and smart ass way, “if there’s one thing them goddamn elves are good at, it’s playing humans. What clued you in to all this? I’m curious now.”

Bob asked the obvious question or, at least, it was quite obvious in his position, “Why the hell would they want our guns?” Balfour waited for the punch line, “they’re almost useless fighting the Orcs. Trust me, I found that out first hand.”

A little smile appeared on Balfour’s lips, “maybe we can do business after all colonel. You seem to be as smart as the emperor thinks you are. Damn sight smarter than that ambassador of yours. Come on, we got to go now.” Now, Bob did get out of the car and, strangely enough, he realized he had no idea where he was going so he asked. Balfour easily replied, “the emperor’s council. We have a permanent seat, a booth really, and the big guy wants you in it today.”

That did not sound right to Bob, “you guys get to speak on their council?”

“Did I say that?” Balfour laughed, “no we get to watch. You even get to listen not that it’ll do you any good. Hell, even I have trouble following their conversations in there. The elves are very ceremonial as you may have noticed. They speak, well sing mostly, in a much older dialect in those chambers. It gets hard to follow, not that I really know, I avoid this duty as much as possible.”

Bob found out how true that was. He also saw why Balfour did his utmost best to avoid this. With everything that had happened up till now, with all the stress that Bob had been put through, he found this ending very anticlimactic and, well, boring. In the end, Bob fell asleep.